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  Something dawns across his expression. “I think I know who you’re talking about. She funds the counselling that is happening at the university for the victims involved in the rape case last year.”

  “She does?” I ask.

  “Yeah. She’s meant to be really good. I only know about her because a friend of mine on the rugby teams’ sister attends the meetings they set up.”

  Our conversation comes to an end when Mark and Levi walk back into the room, their expressions grim.

  That can’t be good—whatever they have to say.

  “What?” I ask, already dreading their answer.

  They sit down in the two-seater, eyeing me warily. “Are you sure you want to know this?” Mark asks, and I know it’s because he’s remembering back to last year, and how withdrawn I had got.

  “I need to know. I’ll go crazy otherwise. What did they say?”

  He shares a look with Levi before facing me. “First, I’ve spoken to your parents.”

  I stare for a few moments, my mouth agape, before snapping out of it. “What? Why?” I ask, angry he would betray me like that. He has no right, and I tell him so. “You had no right to speak to them, Mark. Why would you call them when you know they don’t care about me?”

  “She’s right. What the fuck, mate. You’re meant to be family,” Banner bites out.

  Levi holds his hand up, always the mediator. “Listen to what he has to say before jumping the gun. He didn’t ring to update them on you or what happened, I promise.”

  I nod, looking at Mark and silently telling him to get on with it.

  “I called the lawyer you said you used first, just to see what they had to say. They told me they sent a letter out to your parents’ address a few months agothree to be exactwith the details of Darren’s release date. The letter was addressed to you as you’re no longer a minor. His release date has long passed, Emma. It was him.”

  I gasp at hearing he was here, and that my parents hid that letter from me—if it was even sent. I can’t see them being that malicious. “So, it was him?” I ask, wanting them to confirm I’m not going mad. “I can’t see Mum and Dad hiding a letter from me. It could have been anything. Maybe it got lost in the post.”

  He winces, opening his mouth, then closing it, looking torn. Levi takes his hand, and I watch as he rubs his thumb over the top, soothingly. I look away, feeling a knot in my throat. They should just spit it out. The suspense is killing me. I already know what they’re going to say; I can feel it.

  “It was Darren, but I’ll get back to that in a second. I just need to tell you that your parents knew,” he bites out, gritting his teeth. “They admitted it on the phone when I asked, when I threatened to call our grandparents if they didn’t tell me the truth. They said you didn’t deserve to know, that you would only cause them more stress.”

  He looks away, his chest rising and falling as his jaw clenches.

  Those words shouldn’t hurt, but they do. I know my parents don’t love me, but it still feels like someone is squeezing my heart and twisting it every time they pull something else.

  “They knew he was being released?” I whisper, letting Banner hug me closer.

  He nods sadly. “They did. I’ve informed the lawyer you weren’t notified.”

  “And what did they say about Darren?” Banner asks.

  “He got released just under a month ago. He never moved back home with his parents, but with his aunt, not far from here.”

  “Here?” I squeal, my body shaking again. I don’t know how I feel about the notion of bumping into him all the time. I thought moving away from home before he got released would ease my anxiety, but now he’s here, where I’m trying to make a fresh start.

  “Yeah. They’re going to check in with his probation officer, but according to the lawyer, a restraining order wasn’t issued before his release because your mum and dad never requested one.”

  “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me?” Banner growls.

  I look down at my lap, holding back tears. “So, he’s free to come near me?” I ask hoarsely.

  “We won’t let him. I’ve asked the lawyer to find out if there’s anything we can do and explained the earlier incident. They weren’t even aware of your change of address, so he’s not broken any laws. But that’s not saying he won’t. I can promise we won’t let him touch you.”

  “I can’t believe this is happening. This is meant to be my fresh start. What if he decides to get payback because I sent him to prison?”

  “For a crime he committed,” Banner reminds me softly.

  “He didn’t care that it was his fault my sister died. What makes you think he’ll care that he got sent to prison for something that was his fault?”

  Banner starts running his hand up and down my arm. “Do not take this the wrong way, because I hate the fucker just as much as you, but back then, he was irrational. He was on too many drugs and wasn’t thinking clearly. I know it doesn’t excuse what he did to you, but I think—well, hope—he’s owning up to his mistakes.”

  I tried telling myself he attacked me because of the drugs, but deep down inside, Darren has a dark side. Can he redeem himself? I’m not sure. I’d like to hope I’m the kind of person that would think so, that somewhere inside of me, I can find forgiveness. But after everything he did to me, took from me… it’s all too fresh. He’d have to do something seriously redeemable to prove to me he’s changed, and that in a few months, when his probation period is over, he won’t turn back to drugs—if he hasn’t already.

  I shake my thoughts away, not wanting to think about this anymore. It will just play on my mind until I finally manage to sleep, conjuring up different future scenarios.

  “Can we talk about something else? I can’t deal with any more and talking about it won’t help. It will just keep going around in my head until I find a solution that will deal with it. At the moment, that’s impossible, because I’m going to avoid him at all costs.”

  “Of course,” Levi says.

  “Anything.”

  “My roommate got hammered and shit the bed after eating some bad Chinese food,” Banner blurts out, falling back against the sofa.

  We all turn in his direction, pausing for a moment before bursting into laughter.

  “Well, that wasn’t random and awkward at all,” Levi tells us, chuckling.

  “I can’t be arsed to cook. Does anyone want a particular takeaway?” Mark asks.

  “Not Chinese,” Banner and I say, not after hearing about his roommate.

  We glance at each other before laughing.

  “Pizza it is,” Levi laughs, getting up to grab his phone.

  “I’ll go grab some drinks. Banner, do you want a beer?” Mark asks.

  “Yeah, go on then,” Banner replies.

  Once he’s out of the room, Banner shifts so he’s facing me. “I know you want to forget everything for a bit, but I need to know if you’re really doing okay. That was a lot to digest,” he says, his forehead creased.

  “I’m not sure. I have you guys, though, so I know I’ll be fine in the end.”

  “No, you’d be fine whether you had us or not. You’re the strongest person I know,” he tells me, shocking me speechless. “Whatever happens though, I’ll be here. I’ll always be here.”

  It’s moments like this that I question his feelings towards me. One moment he acts like he’s a friend, then the next, he’ll say something so incredibly sweet, and it makes me wonder if he has feelings for me too; more than just being my friend.

  My feelings run deeper, and not because he was there for me at the worst time of my life. I fell for his touches, his smiles, hearing him laugh and talk. I fell for the person he is and for the person he makes me believe I can be when I’m around him. He makes me feel special, like a mythical creature.

  I glance up from my lap, swallowing past the knot in my throat. “I know you’ll be there. I’m lucky to have you.”

  He expression relaxes, his gaze never
wavering from mine. “I’m the lucky one.”

  Something passes between us, shifting in the air, neither of us looking away. He moves—I move. But before anything can happen, Levi and Mark walk back in and the pull between us breaks.

  “Food’s on its way,” Levi says, sitting down.

  “Here you go,” Mark says to Banner, handing him a beer.

  Banner clears his throat, taking the beer. “Thanks,” he tells him hoarsely.

  Mark turns to me. “I got you a Vimto.”

  I smile, taking the can from him. “Thanks, Mark.”

  “What movie do you fancy watching?” he asks, walking over to the row of DVD’s.

  I can’t look at Banner, but I can feel his stare on the side of my face. “I don’t mind. Just nothing too gory.”

  “Banner?” Mark calls, looking at him for ideas.

  “Um, I don’t mind. I’m easy.”

  For the first time since our friendship began, I feel uneasy. My body is stiff, unsure whether I should move over to the other side of the sofa. My unspoken question is answered when Banner pulls me against him, shifting so his feet are up on the sofa and I’m lying against his chest. He pulls the blanket over us, and I sigh, feeling warm.

  It takes a few moments to relax, but when I do, Banner starts running his fingers through my hair.

  It’s not long into the movie when my eyes begin to drift shut and I fall into a restful sleep.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  I’m lost in the story I’m working on when I hear movement coming from inside my bedroom. Banner has been staying the past few days. He said it’s because he’s too lazy to go home, but I know it’s because he’s worried about me.

  The first couple of days, he slept on the sofa out here, but the last two, he’s fallen asleep in bed with me whilst watching a movie. It’s been nice—being intimately close to him and spending more than an hour or two at a time together. I sound like a stalker, but I grew up without feeling any warmth or love from my parents. My sister loved me, and we were close, but she loved everyone. She was a wild child, went where the mood took her. With Banner… we click. I feel warm and loved when he’s around, and for me, that’s everything. It’s why I’m so scared to show him just how much he means to me. I can’t lose him.

  When the door to my room opens, I snap my laptop shut, knowing Banner will fight to read it.

  I look over the back of the sofa, smiling when he walks out in just his tracksuit bottoms and no shirt, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

  “Morning,” I call out.

  He groans, walking around the sofa and dropping himself next to me. “I can’t believe I’m still tired and it’s nearly noon,” he says groggily. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

  “Because you’ve been getting up at five every morning to go to practice, and then going to classes. You said last night you had the morning and most of the afternoon free, so I turned your alarm off this morning when I got up.” I shrug, like it’s no big deal, blushing when his expression softens.

  He keeps staring at me like I just spent millions on him. I only turned his alarm off to let him get some rest.

  “You know, you really are amazing.”

  My cheeks heat further, and I try to play it off. “I am, aren’t I?”

  He chuckles as he shuffles closer, his arm touching mine. “So, you excited to meet Lake and her boyfriend tomorrow?”

  A smile spreads across my face. “I am. We talk all the time through email and text, sometimes over the phone, but I miss her. She’s really happy, the happiest I’ve ever seen her.”

  “She’s got her family back and a new family added to it,” he says softly.

  My smile falls a little, wishing I had that, and hoping I find that here with Mark, Levi and Banner. “Yeah. They were a small family, but now she has a huge one. They seem really nice—a little crazy, but she fits in,” I tell him. “I hear them over the phone, teasing her or someone else in the background. It’s funny.”

  “What time are we meeting her?”

  “She texted me saying her boyfriend’s brother is going to drop them off, then he’s going to the zoo with his kids or something. I’m not sure. They’re going to meet us here, then we’re going to head to that café Jordan told me about. The one near the university.”

  He thinks about it for a minute. “Fun ‘N Cups?”

  I giggle at the name. “Yeah, that one. Have you been there before?”

  “Yeah, I go for lunch most days. They do the best burgers in town. They’re huge.”

  “I honestly don’t know where you put it,” I tell him, eyeing his hard stomach, his muscles. I look away, feeling my cheeks heat.

  “I’m just fucking awesome,” he says, making me laugh. “Oh, before I forget, I have to go to a meeting the coach has scheduled before class, so I won’t be able to spend the rest of the day with you. You’ve got a class tonight, don’t you?”

  “I do. Mr. Flint wanted us to come in, so he can set our coursework for the term. It should only take an hour at the most. He didn’t want it to take up our lesson time tomorrow as we already only have small amounts of time each night.”

  “What time do you have to be there? My classes finish at five today, but then I have to go meet Tom, who is working with me for a class we have to prepare for.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “We’ve been assigned different subjects to teach, which we’ll demonstrate in front of our class first, then onto another school. The teacher will grade us based on our technique, approach etc.”

  That sounds awesome, and pretty scary. He wants to teach teenagers once he’s finished earning his degree. Why he would want to do that, I don’t know. It wasn’t long ago he was playing up in the classroom at high school.

  “What’s the subject you’re teaching?” I ask, knowing he wants to teach biology.

  His cheeks turn bright pink, and he doesn’t look at me when he answers. “STD’s.”

  My mouth gapes open for a moment before I burst out laughing. When I sober, I clutch my stomach from the ache and face him, trying hard not to start laughing again.

  “Just one, or all of them?”

  He groans, his head dropping back against the top of the sofa. “Just the common ones, then how to treat and cure them. In our written presentation we have to talk about the cells and how it’s caused etc.”

  “Will there be diagrams?” I ask, raising an eyebrow. I bite my lip to stop myself from laughing when he rolls his head to the side, narrowing his eyes at me.

  “You think this is funny?”

  I press my lips together, shaking my head. The second he sits up, looking like someone ran over his puppy, I burst out laughing.

  When he brings his hands up, coming towards me, I squeal, knowing what’s coming. I can see it in his eyes, and the little smirk he has playing on his lips.

  “No, no, no,” I wail, falling back on the sofa.

  I’m laughing so hard, I can barely see him through my watery eyes when he settles above me. Just as I start to wriggle free, his hands come down, his fingers digging in to my sides as he tickles me.

  “Stop!” I cry out, feeling my bladder about to burst.

  “Nope, not until you promise to stop teasing me.”

  I shake my head. “Nope. Never!”

  “Then I won’t stop,” he says, settling between my legs. He brings his face down, and before I can pull away, he’s blowing raspberries in the crook of my neck.

  My sides hurt from laughing, and I’m close to peeing my pants, but it doesn’t stop me from answering him back. “Will it be at an all-girl school?”

  “You little”

  “Genius?”

  He chuckles, so close I can feel his breath on my face. He stops twisting and digging his fingers into my sides as his face loses all expression. We’re both breathing hard, gazing into each other’s eyes. I lick my lips, and he tracks the movement. I hear him groan, his eyes closing for a moment, like he’s restraining himself.
/>   My breath comes out in soft gasp when I feel something hard pressing against my leg. I start breathing heavily for other reasons as a throbbing sensation starts between my legs.

  Without thinking, I raise my hand to cup his cheek. His lips part, his eyes dilating. He starts to lower his head, but a key being put into the lock of the front door startles us. I end up pushing him off me. I gasp, wanting the ground to swallow me up. I’m so embarrassed.

  I sit up quickly, looking down at Banner groaning on the floor, and wince. “I’m so sorry,” I whisper-yell.

  His eyes open, and he winks, but I can see the grimace when he tries to sit up. “It’s fine.”

  He manages to stand as the door opens, and Levi walks in, looking troubled. When he looks up, his eyes widen in surprise. “Banner, I thought you’d be gone by now.”

  Banner looks at the clock hanging above the fireplace. “Nah, I got another twenty minutes. Why, were you missing me?”

  “No. But I was just about to ask Emma to call you. Any chance you don’t have any tattoos on the back of your leg?” Levi asks, looking hopeful.

  Banner doesn’t seem fazed by the question. “My right is bare. Why?”

  “Any chance you would let me tattoo a piece of art onto you? My volunteer broke both of his legs and won’t be out of his casts for another eight weeks.”

  “He broke both of his legs?” I ask, wondering if Levi just got told a load of bull. Who breaks both of their legs?

  Levi closes his eyes for a second, groaning in frustration. “Yes. The fucker was doing one of his YouTube videos. He jumped from the roof of his house onto a trampoline.”

  “A trampoline,” Banner and I say simultaneously.

  “Yeah. The trampoline broke and he landed on both feet. Broke his right one in three places and his left in two. He’s lucky the bone didn’t snap through skin, or that he didn’t damage his spine.”

  Banner and I look at each other before facing Levi. “What’s his YouTube account name?” Banner asks, beating me to it.

  Levi looks between us, then rolls his eyes. “You can’t watch that shit?”

  “We do,” we say, chuckling at his expression.